So I may be about to talk about struggles of marriage, but that doesn't mean my last post doesn't ring true anymore because I am stiiiiiill smiling - even though I happen to be sick as well! (Am I losing it?)
I've just noticed this interesting pattern in my relationship...Matthew and I have had all our worst fights in February! I mean, we've only had two Februarys in our marriage so far, but they stand out because the rest of the time we don't really fight. Disagree? Daily! But fighting? No way. Last February we had our first major fight...and I'll never forget the day. This February, I just started having all kinds of negative thoughts ranging from: My ideas aren't valued around here! Wow, he didn't even notice that I did the laundry! to: He works so hard that I'll never be able to keep up with him. Maybe him and so-and-so who makes all of her bed sheets out of kitten hair would be a better match for him.
Call it coincidence or a start-of-the-year slump, BUT the difference between last February and this February is that we have a year of communication skills and understanding of one another under our belt, and I brought these insecurities up to him and we made up and OH MY GOSH, post-makeup relationship mushy gushiness is the best. I feel like we're dating all over again except I love him 100x more than when we were actually dating. Right in time for Valentines day! Now I've been hiding these for him every morning and he parades around work with his prize and tells people that his wife is better than theirs.
Moral of the story: Bring your insecurities up to him and guess what - he will reassure you! Now somebody build a time machine so I can go tell HIM that before last February happened. Or dont, because, you know, I always have to learn my lessons the hard way.